How To Fix a Relationship You Ruined: 12-Step Guide
This new article will show you everything you need to know about how to mend your broken relationship.
Everyone makes mistakes, and if you make a mistake that upsets your significant other with you, it can be a worrying situation. However, if you want to repair your relationship and provide back what you had, we have some tips for you. Try these suggestions to help restore your bond.
How to Repair a Relationship You Broke:
1. If you and your partner do not communicate, take the first step to reach out.
You can do this by texting or calling, or even meeting in person. As the person who made the error, it’s your responsibility to take the initiative and make amends. If your attempts are ignored, wait a moment and try again, but if there’s still no response, it might be time to move on. It’s never too late to reconnect, even if it has been years since you last spoke.
To initiate a reconnection, you can send a message like, “Hey Kris, it’s been a while. Are you willing to chat sometime soon? There are a few things I want to say.” or “Susan, please call me. I want to fix it and apologize for my mistakes.”
2. When trying to make amends, take responsibility for your actions.
Avoid making excuses and admit the loss you caused. Explain your actions, but accept all the blame and do not try to shift it onto someone else. This step is different from simply apologizing, as it shows that you understand the impact of your behavior before you say “sorry.”
For example, you could say, “I know I hurt you by insulting your job. I’m stressed, but that does not excuse my behavior.” or “I failed to make enough time for you and that was wrong. My schedule should not take precedence over our relationship.”
3. A sincere apology can go a long way in repairing a relationship.
Be sure to mean what you say and not just apologize to appease others. State clearly what you are sorry for to show that you understand the harm you have caused.
For example, you could say, “I’m sorry for the hurtful words I said when I was angry. You don’t deserve it and I know it hurts you.” or “I actually regret not spending more time with you. I’m sorry for neglecting our relationship.”
4. To improve relationships, listen to the other person’s perspective.
Let them talk without distractions and take time to really understand how they’re feeling. This is especially important in romantic relationships where your partner may need to explain why your actions hurt him or her so much.
Avoid interrupting them and ask follow-up questions to show you’re actively listening. For example, you could say, “Can you tell me more?” to show that you are engaged in the conversation.
5. Recognize other people’s emotions and acknowledge them.
Show that you understand the impact of your actions and why they feel the way they do. This conveys to them that you acknowledge your mistake and want to avoid the same pain in the future.
Try expressing this by saying something like, “I understand why you are upset,” or “I understand why it makes you feel that way.”
6. Offer to make amends and ask about what specifically can be done to improve the relationship.
After talking about the problem and offering an apology, ask the other person if there’s any specific action you can take to fix it. It may take them a while to find a solution, but be patient.
When repairing a relationship with a partner, they may want more honesty and openness, while repairing a friendship may require prioritizing the relationship. However, they can also state that nothing can be done. In that case, give them space and time to heal (1).
7. Give them a break if necessary.
They may need time to heal on their own. If what happened was serious, repairing your relationship may take more than one day. Ask if they need space and respect their answer if they do. Don’t reach out to them until they contact you first. This allows them to take a step back and reflect. Patience is important here.
If you’re trying to reconcile with the partner you live with, consider moving in with a friend for a few days to give each other some space. Say something like, “I’m going to stay with Marc for a while to give you some space in the house. I really want to solve the problem.
8. Show the person you hurt how much he means to you by taking concrete action.
Depending on the situation, you can find ways to show that you want to work on the relationship.
For example, if you said something hurtful to your partner about how important he is, take steps to show how much he means to you. If you’ve offended a friend, let them know how much you value their friendship and how much you value them as a person.
9. Avoid repeating the same mistakes.
Check what caused the error and take action to prevent it from happening again. Everyone makes mistakes, but that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable to keep repeating them.
If you’re not sure why it’s happening, consider seeking help from a mental health professional (2). They can help you solve problems and supply suggestions on how to move forward.
If you tend to throw tantrums when you are under stress, find ways to manage it, such as reducing responsibility or reducing stress levels. If anger leads you to abuse someone, learn healthy methods of communication and expression. If mistrust leads to false accusations against your partner, work on building trust and creating a positive relationship.
10. Turn your mistakes into valuable lessons.
Turn your mistakes into lessons to learn from. Try to see the silver lining and what you can gain from the situation. For example, if you neglected friendships with other people, you may have realized the importance of working to maintain those relationships.
If you hurt your partner by speaking hurtfully in an argument, you may have realized the importance of speaking kindly, even when emotions run high. If you wrongly accuse your partner of something, you may find that you need to work on your trust issues.
11. Understand and value the results.
The person you hurt can choose to forgive you or not. Their healing process and relationship with you can determine whether or not they need more time or need to separate. You cannot control their decisions, so you must respect them, no matter how much they affect you.
12. Consider couples therapy with your partner.
If you and your partner want to improve your relationship but aren’t sure how, couples therapy may be helpful. In therapy, you can talk to an neutral third party about what happened and receive guidance on how to avoid repeating the same problem.
Therapy can provide a safe space for you and your partner to work on your relationship. If you are also struggling with individual issues, individual therapy can be a helpful addition.
In this article, we have discussed how to repair a broken relationship.
In conclusion, the first step is to apologize and speak about what happened. You can then ask other people if there’s anything you can do to fix it.
Give the other person space when needed, show how much she or he means to you, take steps to stop the same mistake from happening again, and learn from it. You must accept their decision, whatever it may be, and you may additionally consider going to couples counseling or individual therapy.
Thank you for reading this article on how to mend a relationship you broke and I actually hope you take action on my advice.
I wish you good luck and that I hope that its content has been a good help to you.