How To Be Great Conversationalist: 17 Essential Tips And Tricks

how to make yourself more approachable

This new article will show you everything you need to know about how to become an amazing conversationalist.

Sometimes communicating with other people can be difficult! However, there are some basic conversation skills you can practice to become more confident and friendly, whether you are talking to a friend or someone you just met.

When talking to other people, try to be upbeat and involved and provide them your full attention. Ask open-ended questions to keep the discussion going, and show you are concerned by nodding your head.

How To Be A Great Speaker:

1. Encourage dialogue by asking open-ended questions.

By asking “yes” or “no” questions, you aren’t giving participants the opportunity to develop and discuss the subject. Instead, ask open-ended questions, such as:

“Tell me about your childhood” rather than “Where did you grow up?

When you have free time, what do you enjoy the most?

“How did you and _____ meet?” or “How did you bond with him in the first place?”

Keep in mind that asking personal or inappropriate questions that are completely unrelated to the topic of discussion can annoy people. If you ask the same question over and over again, the person will get annoyed and stop talking to you.

2. To ask the other person to continue the conversation, say, “Tell me more.”

A discussion can sometimes be interrupted because the other party feels that he’s talking too long or that the argument is boring. Encourage him to continue the conversation by saying, “Tell me more” in a polite and open manner.

For example, “Tell me more about this procedure” or “Tell me more about how this was for you.” Comments like these show that you care about what the other person has to say and can lead to further, in-depth discussion.

3. After you have answered one question, change it.

Other people can be really good at asking questions, and that is awesome! After you have answered their questions, continue the discussion by asking them about themselves. For example, if they ask what type of novel you would like to read, ask if they’ve read anything interesting recently that they can suggest.

If someone asks you a question about something, likelihood is they’ve heard of it, so you can focus on that issue.

4. If you aren’t familiar with a subject, ask someone for more information.

There’s nothing wrong with saying you do not know something—if someone asks or tells you something you do not understand, say something like: “This is something I don’t know.” Can you tell me more about it? “

If someone makes you feel guilty because you didn’t know something, they probably weren’t very kind or considerate.

By not claiming to know more than you do, you are showing that you are a real person and may make others perceive you as more trustworthy.

5. Maintain a pleasant tone to show that you are engaged in the conversation.

When you’re nervous, your tone may sound strange, so practice speaking kindly to others. When you speak, smile to show that you are willing to discuss things and to help people feel more comfortable.

Watch your body language. Crossed arms or drawn shoulders are a sign that you are unapproachable; keep your arms at your sides and don’t look at the ground.

6. Use open body language to appear more approachable.

Crossing your arms over your chest can make you appear irritable and introverted. Instead, if possible, keep your arms at your sides and pay attention to your shoulders, which should be back and relaxed, not clenched around your ears.

Looking up and forward, rather than looking down, which can convey anxiety and embarrassment, conveys confidence.

Even if you don’t feel confident and are reluctant to talk to people, try to fake it with your body language; You may be surprised how much body language affects your demeanor (1).

7. Make eye contact with the other person to show that you are interested.

The most important thing to remember is that your attention should be focused on the person in front of you, not on your phone or anything else. It’s fine if you occasionally look away and break eye contact, but try to keep looking at the other person as much as possible.

When you’re chatting with someone, definitely put the phone down. You and others will be disturbed by incoming notifications, messages, and calls.

There’s a fine line between not looking someone in the eye at all and looking at them and making them feel uncomfortable—looking more natural, nodding, smiling, and sometimes looking away.

8. To ensure your privacy, adjust your volume.

If you are speaking to a larger group of people, make sure your voice is loud enough for everyone to hear. If you’re speaking in a more intimate setting, such as a restaurant or small gathering, speak quietly enough not to disturb other people.

For example, if you’re in a noisy restaurant, instead of screaming to be heard and causing noise, lean closer to your partner so you can hear each other better.

9. Practice empathy by paying attention to other people’s body language.

Tapping his toes, looking away frequently, crossing his arms, checking his phone, frowning, fidgeting, or repeating a gesture are all signs that the other person is impatient or annoyed. This behavior may indicate that the other person wants to end the discussion or that they are scared or worried.

If you are worried, you can ask if the person is worried or worried: “Is everything okay? You seem a little annoyed. “

If you think the other person is trying to stop the discussion, say something like, “I don’t want to hold you back too long.”

10. Use “affirmative response” to show that you’re paying attention to the speaker.

Short words or gestures that signal the other person to continue talking are called “affirmative responses.” Nodding your head, tilting your head to the side, and barely furrowing your brows to show you are concentrating are all nonverbal gestures. You can even try using the following sound statement:

Mm-hmm, right. Yes.

Keep in mind that if you overuse these comments, the interviewee may become distracted. When other people stop or look at you to ensure you’re listening, this is a reasonable time to do so.

11. Talk about what you think the other person is thinking or feeling.

This isn’t just repeating what the other person has said, but repeating information in a way that shows you understand what they’re saying. In essence, you want to convey that you understand the person’s feelings by putting yourself in their shoes.

If a colleague tells you about a nasty incident at work, you might respond, “This seems like a very difficult misunderstanding to resolve.”

12. Don’t interrupt others with your own comparable story.

It’s great if you have something to say, but you are waiting for the other person to finish speaking before you start. Interrupting the person you are talking to shows that you are not paying attention to them and are just waiting for you to speak.

If you often interrupt other people, it is a good idea to say something like: “Please accept my sincere apologies.” I have a bad tendency to interrupt people. Please keep saying what you are saying. “

13. Learn to tolerate silence and interruptions well.

It’s a natural temptation to strike up a conversation to fill an uncomfortable silence (2), but the next time you’re engaged in a discussion, count to five in your mind and tell yourself that it’s okay if there are pauses in the conversation—probably only for about 15 seconds, then you’ll move on.

If you want, you can start a new topic of discussion or just wait for the lull to pass and see if anyone else has something to say.

If the silence lasts too long, you can excuse yourself to use the restroom or refill your drink. If you want to take a break, taking a break is a natural opportunity to do so.

14. Create a pleasant atmosphere by discussing rather than arguing.

Take the opportunity to learn and have fun while talking to others. If someone says something you don’t agree with, try to understand why they thought the way they did. There’s nothing wrong with disagreeing, but stay calm and remember that the goal of the conversation isn’t to convince someone to change their mind, but to get to know that person better.

It’s okay to stop the discussion if someone says something rude or offensive. Avoid judging people and try to respect different points of view, but if the person makes you feel uncomfortable, try to involve the other person in the discussion or find an excuse to leave.

15. If someone makes a bad comment, give them a chance.

For example, if someone is complaining about something, consider that they may not be able to express how they are feeling (everyone needs to vent sometimes), and if someone makes a weird comment, remember that everyone can be weird sometimes, and you can be too. might say strange things in conversation when you’re annoyed.

If you’re at a party and someone is talking too much about a recent case of the flu, keep in mind that they may be afraid to say more to keep the conversation going. Find something you can refer to to avoid bringing up the fact that oversharing is weird.

For example, you could say something like: “Oh, and I thought my friend had the flu at the same time.” When you are sick, what is your favorite movie to watch? This helps keep the dialogue on track.

In general, try to keep the dialogue upbeat and forward-looking, and respect other people, even if you think they’re weird.

16. Stick to good topics to keep the discussion going.

It’s fine to talk about difficult topics with someone you don’t know well, but if you’re talking to someone new, try to focus on topics that excite you or excite you.

Avoid disclosing too much personal information to new acquaintances. Instead, talk to a trusted close friend about the facts in your relationship or any personal issues you’re having.

17. Step back gracefully from the discussion.

Ending a discussion can be the most difficult aspect of dealing with people. Practicing a few statements at home can help you remember them when you need them. Experiment with these endings:

“Happy to talk with you. I have a few more guests to greet today, but I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening. “

“I have to go now, but I really enjoyed learning more about you. Can we exchange phone numbers to talk later? “

“Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me tonight. I will go to the restroom and say hello to a few other people, but I hope to see you again soon!”

I want to thank you for taking the time to read my article on how to be an amazing speaker. I actually hope that its content has been of good help to you.