How To Develop Charisma And Instant Influence: [10-Step Guide]

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Want to understand how to develop charisma? Most of us have possibly met someone in our life who attracts other people like a magnet.

Whenever such a person appeared, he aroused interest and have become the center of attention. Some people seem to have a natural charisma that makes them successful, particularly in social situations.

On the other hand, many people lack charismatic qualities.

Although they’re clever and knowledgeable, they’ve difficulty regarding other people, it’s difficult for them to form and build relationships and communicate effectively.

If you are currently missing charisma or want to strengthen it, there are several ways you can do it.

What is charisma?

Judging by its definition, charisma is a set of character traits that make a person unique in society.

The term charisma comes from theology. This is how people endowed with the “gift of God” are defined.

People with charisma can make you admire them, respect them, consider their opinion. In the presence of somebody who is gifted with charisma, you feel good to be with him.

If this person asks you to do something, you will likely agree. Sometimes you even want to mimic their behavior and way of life.

How to Develop Charisma

1. Proper posture

One easy way to make yourself more charismatic to those around you is to maintain proper posture. Try to be straight and avoid slouching.

A slouched posture indicates that you’re a timid, insecure, shy person with low self-esteem. An easy silhouette is a sign of confidence, vitality, energy and discipline in body language.

Especially when you are sitting, sit up straight so you look taller. Contrary to appearances, this is extremely important.

There are even studies showing that people with higher growth are more likely to be hired and paid more than people with lower growth.

No matter how tall you are, you can all the time stand up straight to optically elongate your figure. Do not lean your head and stay high.

Don’t lean on your elbows, sit up straight with your arms by your side or in front of you. A straight back affects our image and mood.

The right attitude works both ways, thanks to it you feel more confident and take action, on the other hand you are more charismatic and folks will be more willing to talk to you and build relationships.

2. Enjoy touch and physical contact

One of the skills of charismatic people is knowing when to use touch and physical contact with other people. Many people avoid physical contact and often do not understand how to do it properly.

Touch can be your powerful ally in strengthening your charisma. However, it must be used skillfully. Not everybody likes to be touched.

Some of us don’t tolerate entering their intimate space if the person doesn’t have a really close and intimate relationship with us.

You must cross the barrier of physical contact with another person to bond with them, but you must do it skillfully.

The simplest form of touch is a handshake. A robust handshake indicates a high level of energy, an openness to new experiences, and an absence of shyness.

Weak gentle shaking of hands during their application is taken into account a manifestation of uncertainty, embarrassment and lack of interest.

There are other gestures: hugs, hugs, high fives, pats on the back. With the help of touch you can give a compliment, support someone, give recognition and luxury.

Remember that forcing intimacy on another individual may be considered harassment, particularly in business relationships.

For some people, hugging someone who is not a family member or spouse can be awkward. When you are not sure if you can afford to touch, just ask and get the other person’s approval.

If you want to lead and be more charismatic, you need to learn to touch people.

3. Recognize non-verbal signals

People very often do not talk directly about their emotions and how they really feel.

Even when you ask them about it, they will tell you that everything is ok, even although they feel very different in their hearts, souls, and minds.

But simply because they do not say it out loud doesn’t suggest they do not show other clues.

To become a more charismatic person, you must master the art of interpreting what’s called “body language.”

Body language generally includes non-verbal messages such as: gestures and body movements, facial expressions, body posture and body direction, eye and pupil movements.

It is usually possible to tell how a person is feeling based on the expression on their face, how they behave and move. Non-verbal signals can say a lot a few person’s intentions and emotions.

Body language, gestures and behavior are very useful in personal and experienced life.

Its mastery makes it easy to carry out conversations, negotiations, meetings and we can use it to more effectively influence others positively.

Of course, when trying to read body language and non-verbal messages, remember the fact that a person’s context and habits matter.

There is no 100% certainty that we have a good reading of emotions, but developing a better recognition of body language can be very useful.

Sometimes we associate charismatic people with the undeniable fact that they all the time know what to say and tell an interesting story.

They can make others laugh and smile. This is usually as a result of the undeniable fact that these people “read” other people very well and therefore they know what to say in a given situation and what to say in silence.

It is important to learn the secrets of non-verbal communication in order to become more charismatic.

4. Use humor and smile

One of the traits of a charismatic person (1) is their ability to put others in a good mood. This lets you skillfully use jokes and humor and make other people smile on their faces.

Charismatic people also like to smile to themselves, because it makes them feel positive, open and friendly.

Telling funny anecdotes and stories can go a long way in building your image and rapport. However, you need a good feeling for it.

Making mindless jokes can have the exact opposite effect and alienate the other person.

The right moment and context to tell the joke is extremely important. Telling a joke at the wrong time can be misinterpreted.

Here, again, it is helpful to read other people’s body language and emotions, as this makes it easier to feel a good moment of humor.

Smiling helps and can be contagious. People feel better in the company of positive people, with a sense of humor than gloomy, sad people with negative attitudes.

5. Ask questions skillfully

Skillfully asking the right questions is a really useful competency. Our thinking is based on asking questions and finding answers.

Charisma may seem to have little to do with asking questions, but in fact, people who understand how to ask good questions of the other person can make better contact with others.

A question is also a fantastic and easy way to keep a conversation going.

Many people like to speak about themselves and their interests. Charismatic people know it, so they do not speak about themselves, they let the other person speak about it.

They particularly often use open-ended questions, for which a straightforward “yes” or “no” answer is not enough, allowing the interlocutors to share their thoughts.

When you talk, you learn nothing. When you ask questions and listen carefully, you get relevant information about other people.

You find areas of common interest with your interlocutors and find new topics for general conversation.

Asking the right questions is a skill you must practice to increase your charisma and build good relationships.

6. Listen actively

As we converse and use questions, we must also learn the art of active listening.

The question is important, but we must listen carefully to understand the answer. The ability to listen actively is important for charismatic people and should be developed by all of us.

It’s not enough just to use the sense of hearing and listen to the sound that comes out. You need to learn to listen, focus on the other person and react actively to what you say.

Charismatic people can be very attracted by one another’s words. They actively listen to what they can do to create a relationship based on mutual respect, trust and empathy.

There are several rules that will let you listen better and actively listen.

Some of these include being correct and turning to the other person, maintaining eye contact, continuing to interrupt, asking questions, paraphrasing, showing interest, and inspiring the other person to continue talking.

Active listening is not easy. However, it is worth putting in the effort and developing this skill.

7. Remember the name

This little tip can benefit you a lot. Often when you meet someone, even if they’ve introduced themselves, you forget their name.

If you are approached by someone you should introduce the other person to, you abruptly realize that you do not remember their name.

When there’s only one person, obviously it is easier to remember their name, it is even tougher when we’re in a meeting, for example, there are several people and everybody says their name.

Charismatic people have their own way of doing this and realize that remembering someone’s name and using it later is a fantastic way to signal to the other person who they’re important to you.

Thanks to this, the person feels better in our company. We are generally very connected to our name, no wonder we hear and use it from childhood.

There are several ways to better remember someone’s name. We recommend using associations. When you meet new people, it is a good idea to combine their name with something you are familiar with.

Maybe even a random word. Then, looking at this person, we will also retain this word in our memory and in this way we will remember the person’s name.

This works particularly well when these associations are related to what we know about this person.

If we know that Catherine likes to work in the garden, we can use the word “garden”. To remember better, we can even repeat someone’s name when they introduce themselves to us.

You’d be surprised how much more charismatic you will become if you consistently remember people’s names.

8. Use gestures

Charismatic people can use gestures (2), thanks to which they can reinforce their verbal messages. It’s not about waving, but about enriching your speech with gestures that will make people more engrossed in what you are saying.

Hands play an extremely important role in communication. They can be used to indicate direction, size and shape, in addition to to simply express emotion.

We feel hand movements subconsciously and do not even wonder why we feel more snug and safe when the interlocutor’s hand is not hidden and the inside of the hand is facing up.

Use cues in a tactful and natural way, so you can build your credibility and image as a dynamic person.

9. Eliminate unnecessary distractions and language errors

Sometimes in conversation we use unnecessary interjections like “eee”, “uh”, “umm” or other phrases that we regularly repeat in our statements.

Especially when we talk longer, we try to fill it in this way and avoid silence.

Using pauses in speech is not bad and can even have a positive effect on the strength of the message. This phrase can even be caused by nervousness and stress.

Sometimes better breath control or speaking slower can help you avoid those additions.

Also remember that you do not all the time must answer right away if someone asks you a question. Instead of starting with an “uh,” give yourself a moment to consider the answer.

If you want to be received better, you should work on eliminating unnecessary interruptions from your speech and speak clearly, understandably, and grammatically correct.

To find out if you have a problem with this, record a public performance and count how many “interruptions” you make in your speech and how many language errors you make. If you know you have a problem, work to solve it.

A sign of self-confidence and charisma is the ability to make long speeches without using such sentences.

Charismatic people speak clearly with conviction, their words are thought out in such a way that their message is received positively and perceived as reliable and credible.

10. Take care of your appearance

When we meet someone for the first time we regularly notice their appearance and clothing first.

Charismatic people often through their costumes can amplify the effect they feel. They give the impression that they’re doing well in life.

Thanks to the right clothes and manners, you can come across as a charismatic person.

Clothing is among the easiest elements to change with regards to building and enhancing your image and strengthening your charisma.

The way you behave and how you look is what people think of you. Charismatic people are confident and think about themselves worthy people.

They are able to present themselves well and attract attention. They boldly formulate their opinion, are open and can communicate with virtually anyone.

Charisma consists of many characters and skills. Work to become a more charismatic person.

This will allow you not only to more effectively convince your reasons, but also to feel better and more confident.

I want to thank you for taking the time to read my article on how to develop charisma. I actually hope that its content has been of good help to you.