If you are searching for how to have a good conversation then this article is for you.
Most people when they hear the word conversation what comes to their mind is two people talking to one another, if you think so, you are wrong. Conversation is more than simply talking to one another.
Conversation is more than creating synchronization between two people allowing them to share understandings.
Good conversation helps you see what’s not there, hear what’s in other people’s heads, see things as others see them, etc.
How to Have a Good Conversation
1. Make other people the focus of the conversation.
It’s really easy for me to do, we at all times have an internal need to be heard and that is why it is at all times been very important to learn to listen very carefully to what other people are saying.
If you do not listen carefully, you end up missing the person’s goals and what’s important to the person.
You need to show them that you understand whatever they’re saying, otherwise they will think too much about their feelings and they will not be capable to hear you.
Focus on the other person and listen carefully do not be that kind of guy who at all times talks about it. Get inside other people’s heads and know what he values and their view of the world.
It’s easy to find yourself finishing other people’s stories but if you end up in such a position stop because you do not really know the full story.
Sometimes there will be awkward moments when both of you are silent, if you don’t have anything to say, just accept the silence because you might embarrass yourself.
2. Learn to listen to what is not being said.
I suppose you get what I mean trying to get home here, body language is essential and if there’s a discrepancy between what the mouth is saying and facial expressions then something is not right.
Focus on communication channels such as environment, body language and basic temperament.
Know what nonverbal cues are telling you and how they can be used to enhance conversation
3. Don’t follow the news.
This may sound crazy or funny, but consider how many times you have stopped someone in the middle of a conversation because you were sure you already knew the end of the story?
I believe time and time again, if you do not follow whatever the news is saying every day, there is a good chance you will have good listening skills and perhaps even be happier.
Give yourself a break and stop checking social media for a few week. Instead of picking up a book and reading. After the break, assess your mood and the overall quality of your conversation.
Ok be realistic, it can be hard to keep away from the news, so minimize your exposure to them.
4. Do some communication experiments.
As they say, practice makes perfect, so you need to do some experimenting to get better. Things at all times get better with time if you use that time wisely.
Talk to new people when you’re at the grocery store, if you see someone wearing a shirt with a picture of your favourite superhero talk to them, ask the cafeteria staff how they’re doing, etc. your conversation skills.
Remember that each conversation is a learning experience.
5. Get yourself some conversation hooks.
Starting a conversation may seem difficult but it is really pretty simple as no magic tricks are required to get started. You just need to find some hooks from other people.
Everyone is different and each conversation is unique so there isn’t any possible way to have one conversation hook (1) for all conversations. The best way to get a conversation hook is to see what other people are wearing.
Try using this conversation hook in your next conversation and you will see that it makes the conversation so much easier.
6. Avoid conveying negative vibes.
During a conversation, it is essential to avoid negative impressions about yourself because you aren’t just talking to the person you are talking to.
Most people will learn something about you and largely share it with their friends. So it is very important to share something that will have a positive impact on their lives.
It’s also very important to make the conversation lively by sharing something that made you laugh or something you learned recently.
7. Deepen your relationship.
Assess your recent relationships and see where they land on the pyramid. Let’s see what you can do to move the relationship from a lower to a higher level. Don’t force them, do it step by step.
8. Avoid arguments.
This one is straight forward, an argument for losers, plain and easy.
9. Know when to walk away from the conversation.
Sometimes it is pointless trying to talk to someone who is practically impossible to talk to.
What I’m trying to say is that there’s a type of guy who has a power play and dominates every conversation particularly in group conversations. Don’t try to change their mind because you will not just walk away.
10. Always be prepared for a tough conversation.
Sometimes you’ll be asked to provide feedback that others may not be happy to hear. Don’t be afraid to speak your mind, be honest and direct with the person (2).
Having a good conversation is not as hard as many people might be tempted to think.
All you need is to find out how to have a good conversation and I’m sure you have learned the same thing.