Want to understand how to be friendly? Then you are in the right place.
Some of us are born with a natural ability to get together with other people. Others, no. It does not matter. We are complex people, with diversified pasts, and it’s important to understand that one’s current social condition is not permanent.
The first step is wanting to make a change.
You, the reader, have clicked on this article with the intention of making changes. Stay with me, and that I can help you start your journey towards hospitality. I know this technique works if you try hard enough at it.
By following the ten easy steps outlined in this text, you can make friends and have significant relationships, and ultimately feel snug in social situations.
How To Be Friendly And Kind:
1. Understanding Perception
Perception is a tricky thing. We all want ourselves to be seen as something, whether that’s lovely, smart, kind, or whatever.
Most often, we spend too much time focusing on other people’s perceptions rather than how we see ourselves.
Nothing shines through a person’s personality like insecurity. It makes us withdraw and hide within walls built to protect ourselves.
And it is okay to feel insecure. Everyone does it at some point, but in the end, it is important to realize that people are different, and your weaknesses will all the time be someone else’s strengths.
Focusing on the undeniable fact that someone may be “superior” in some way only holds you back from trying to be a better person. Only once you start believing in yourself and your potential will others see the same thing.
On to some practical applications of this new knowledge. It’s easy to read something and be like “oh yeah, I would change,” but the reality is that changing someone’s mindset, particularly as an adult, is something you really must work on.
Whenever you think something bad about yourself or someone else, you must actively stop that thought and analyze why it’s toxic.
Over time, you can stop or reduce these intrusive thoughts, but only by being proactive.
Another thing that I find useful when feeling down is to look in the mirror. Look at yourself, do not just stare. Say to yourself “I love you.”
Watch how difficult it’s. I can assure you, you’ll feel stupid doing it the first few times, even like you might be lying, but after a while, it really starts to matter.
Then, when you are feeling really down, you can go to the mirror and really feel the impact of those three words. Self-love is the key to earning the love of others.
So while it is important to pay attention to how people perceive you, because it lets you reflect on your behavior, it is also important not to value those perceptions more than how you see yourself.
Self-improvement should focus on the future, and not the past.
Self-awareness is something that everybody can work on. It’s about analyzing yourself in relation to other people, and recognizing when your behavior affects others negatively.
The end goal here is to be friendly and approachable, which is hindered by an absence of self-awareness.
Say, for example, you are meeting someone for the first time. This is the perfect opportunity to make a new connection, but you accidentally say something impolite. Outside the window there is a chance for friendship or business relations.
A person who is not self-aware may not realize that they’re being impolite, and ignore the reactions of others, whereas a person who is self-aware will reflect on their behavior during or after the fact, and choose to change it, or really change it at the time.
Self-aware people can recognize their rudeness in these situations, and actively emphasize politeness for the rest of the encounter, potentially saving the relationship.
Now, how does one practice self-awareness? It’s all about being objective. Take a close look at the traits that you perceive as strengths and weaknesses, and try to see how those beliefs influence your behavior.
Sit alone for a while and take some time to reflect on your behavior. What went well, what did not?
Keep a journal for these self-observations, and for everybody else, write down why it is nice or bad, and what you can do to maintain/stop such behavior.
I’ve found that keeping a journal not only allows me to reflect on my behavior that day, it also brings tremendous peace and increases my emotional stability.
It allows me to express my thoughts however I select, feelings I hold back from associating with others. Try to write every day if you can, and if not, as often as possible.
Another way to be self-aware is to be actively conscious. At any time when you’re around people, pay attention to yourself and categorize your impulses.
You may instinctively do or say something awkward or dangerous, and that is okay. it happens. What’s important is that you hold back and choose not to do it again.
Mistakes occur, and self-improvement is all about moving forward.
Self-censorship is closely related to self-awareness because it involves analyzing everything you say to other people. When in social situations, it is best to avoid being racist, misogynistic, and homophobic, because you never know what other people’s political beliefs are.
If you meet someone who is blatantly offensive to others, it’s best to cut ties if you can, because this is the 21st century and we do not have time for it TF
Also, impolite things can slip when someone does not think before they speak. That’s why it is important to form a sentence in your mind, ensure it is not harmful or impolite, and then say it.
Checking what you say is an integral part of being friendly and straightforward to get together with.
Dressing up is essential to appear friendly and approachable. Here I’ll outline some of the parts of being groomed. The first is to have an unkempt appearance.
Clothing must not be wrinkled or torn, and shoes must be clean. One’s hands and face should be washed twice a day, once in the morning and once before going to bed.
This practice is a great way to stop dirt from collecting under the nails, in addition to preventing the spread of disease. It’s also important that you brush your teeth.
Bad breath is a sure fire way to discourage anyone from socializing with you. Brush your teeth before leaving the house, and before going to bed to minimise the growth of bacteria.
You may find that your breath starts to smell after eating, in which case you can chew some fresh gum to make your breath smell good. People love people who smell good.
This leads to my next point: body odor should not exist. Wear perfume, deodorant, antiperspirant, body-spray, scented body lotion.
Anything that covers or prevents body odor. However, this one is tricky because it is also important not to overdo it. S
Trong cologne is a real killer, so ensure your scent is not so strong that it gives those around you a headache.
Having clean hands and fingernails is a must, as it makes people feel more snug shaking hands. Proper hand hygiene is a sign of good character.
Remember to all the time change your underwear and socks to avoid odors. Another important thing is to brush your hair and get frequent haircuts to keep it clean and tidy.
By following these tips and taking a common-sense approach to cleanliness, you can make those around you much more snug.
4. Body Language
When you interact with someone, you are talking to them both verbally and visually. Only through the way you hold yourself can one determine your level of confidence. It’s all the time best to be confident, even if not too over the top.
Here I’ll outline some ways in which you can appear more confident through your body language.
Power poses are important in showing confidence, but also gaining confidence. By positioning yourself in a way that shows strength, you become stronger.
One example is the way your feet sit. If they’re uncrossed and barely apart, those around you’ll feel your confidence.
However, crossing or squeezing your legs tightly is a definite sign of discomfort or anxiety. That’s why I all the time recommend sitting with your legs uncrossed, forming a slight “V” shape.
However, it is important not to overdo it here, as spreading your legs too far can offer you a very confident attitude, which drives people away.
Upper body posture is also integral to making sure people see you as confident and approachable.
Slouching with your neck extended is not only unattractive, but can even indicate an awesome deal of discomfort in social situations or apathy towards those with whom you interact.
Sitting up straight with your shoulders back makes people want to interact with you. Having good posture makes you appear more engaged, less withdrawn.
In a business environment, these tips are also very useful, because confidence is essential when interacting with colleagues, bosses and employees.
Having good posture is the first step to easily earning people’s respect. And, if your goal for reading this is solely to make more friends, people do not want to interact with people who are quiet and appear aloof, so if you improve your posture, you will come across as more approachable.
You do not have to look like a magazine cover model to master this aspect of interpersonal interaction. The truth is, being fashionable is simple so long as you follow a few easy rules.
1. Keep your clothes in good condition.
This means no stains, rips or holes. When your clothes start to bunch up, throw them away or donate them. You do not even must buy new clothes, there are lots of options at your local thrift store that are like new.
2. Wear clothes that fit.
Clothes that are too baggy or too tight are unflattering, so make sure to buy things that are your size. They will even be more snug.
3. Keep your shoes clean and in condition
It is alleged that one of the most significant factors of the first impression is your footwear. If your shoes are worn out or worn out, the shallower humans on this earth are more likely to associate you with those adjectives.
So when your shoes break down, it is important to buy new ones, either at a shoe store or a thrift store, which have much cheaper and often just nearly as good options.
A great way to maintain the quality of your shoes is to wash them repeatedly with dish soap and a toothbrush.
4. Do not wear conflicting patterns
Streaks and spots shouldn’t mix. In general, it is good to have only one pattern in an outfit, and the rest is solid.
5. Do not dress too flashy
Your clothes do not have to make you look like a celebrity. As long as you dress according to the occasion, casual, semi-formal, formal, you will be fine.
6. Dim color is all the time yes
You wear those clothes, those clothes should not wear you. If you are short on clothing inspiration, try Pinterest or Google Images.
By having a good sense of fashion, people will see you as more engaged with your environment, and more likely to want to interact with you.
6. Facial Expressions
When people talk to you, they look at your face, which is why it is important to consider your facial expressions. Your expression should suit the person you are talking to, because it is a form of bonding.
If they smile, smile too. Speaking of smiling, smile more often.
Smiling shows people that you’re friendly and approachable, that is the goal here, right. When people first come up to you, smile at them. Make sure the smile is in your eyes, and not just your mouth, because it is more of a smirk, more of a dick.
However, be sure you smile at the right time. When someone makes a joke, smile. When someone shares a really personal anecdote, do not.
Show you care on your face. Facial sympathy is the key to gaining the trust and affection of those around you. When not talking to someone, never frown.
At least keep your face in a neutral smiling position, which gets your muscles moving a bit. This is a good position for most occasions.
Mimicking people’s facial expressions and reacting with appropriate facial expressions will show others that you empathize and sympathize with them, which will open doors of new friendships.
A large part of social interaction is sharing personal anecdotes, stories that show others who you really are. They can be witty, funny, sad, tragic, you name it.
But they must be right. Lying is a big mistake when trying to meet friends, because people hold on to your personal anecdotes for future reference, and if you entirely forget a story you told, it can get a bit awkward.
In tune with the conversation. If you are in a happy mood, tell a happy anecdote. Listen to other people’s anecdotes and respond accordingly. Never give in to talking about yourself, otherwise you will appear egocentric. Wait your turn, then tell us something else about yourself.
If you are open with others about your life experiences and feelings, in most cases they will respond in kind. Humans love to share, and by starting that sharing, you can look forward to learning and connecting with those around you.
A good anecdote fits into the mood of the conversation. Light and funny conversation shouldn’t be answered with tales about the death of your grandparents.
Mistakes like that are sure to hurt your chances of connecting with the person you are talking to.
If you do not feel snug talking about yourself quickly, maybe practice a few anecdotes with different moods before you go to an event with social interaction.
Personal anecdotes allow others to learn from and connect with you, so, when making friends, being open about your life will only serve you well.
8. Be more generous
Volunteering is a life changing experience.
This not only enhances your interpersonal interaction skills but also shows others that you’re an empathetic individual who deeply cares a few particular issue, be it animals, the environment or humanity. Finding volunteer work is fairly easy.
Many animal shelters, churches, hospitals, and soup kitchens have volunteer departments that are all the time searching for more people.
Often they will ask you for an interview. During this interview, it is important to show them how much you care about their goals. It’s a surefire way to get in position.
However, volunteering should not be about how people see you, it should be about improving yourself. Charity forces you to become a better person, which will make you a more desirable candidate for interpersonal relationships.
Volunteering lets you meet like-minded people who are also passionate about helping a cause. It’s an awesome way to meet people and build community.
9. Seek Social Interaction
Of all the tips I wrote, this is the most significant. You won’t ever be more friendly or approachable if you actively avoid human interaction.
Practice makes perfect, as they say, and the more you talk to people, the better and more confident you’ll become.
It may be difficult at first, and you may not succeed, but if you keep trying, you’ll certainly make positive changes in your life.
Many communities host events where you can go out and socialize with other people, so a good place to look is online.
Volunteering, as mentioned above, is also an awesome place to socialize. If you are at university, there are many opportunities, whether it is joining a sport or a club, or simply hanging out in the dining room.
Humans were created for change. Our brains are continuously changing, and if you try hard enough, the way your brain works can change. If you feel as although you won’t ever be a social person, I implore you to give it a try. Try, try, try again.
That’s all it takes.
This section is not so much a tip as an expression of sympathy. There are so many kinds of individuals in this world, and plenty of of them are kind, fair, and interested in talking to you.
Some do not and you must live with it. Some people won’t ever want to interact with you, no matter how hard you try or change.
It does not matter. There are so many people in this world who aren’t interested in only a small part, and should be forgotten.
You are a person who deserves respect, and if people refuse to offer you what you deserve, then you should forget about them, because they will only bring you down.
Part of being friendly and approachable is about being yourself, and if the person you are trying to interact with does not want to accept you, then you should find someone new.
Some fellow humans are assholes, and there is nothing we can do but forget about them.
I want to thank you for taking the time to read my article on how to be kind.
I actually hope that its content has been of good help to you.